Angry.

So I've been feeling a bit depressed lately.
Not the usual depression that plagued me for...forever.
But more of a pissed off depression.

Now, I've always been a jaded 20-something liberal (even in 4th grade I wrote essays about how feminism was a useful critique of society; as you can guess, I didn't have many friends). But lately, my disillusionment has been reaching terrifying levels.
I've been doing serious research into urban and sub-urban communes. I want to participate in Buy Nothing Day (November 26th, y'all). I want to sell all my clothes and use my money to buy a gas mask and tons of anarchist posters/stickers to tag the academic buildings with. WHY IS NO ONE ELSE HERE OUTRAGED.
The rampant consumerism had me fooled for so long. But I refuse to let my shit own me. I'm done with crying and stressing over money. I realize that I need to be financially secure in order to live a normal life in this fucked up society, but I don't understand why it needs to run my whole life. I can't take it with my once I die. My obituary wont feature my bank balance. How can I be a catalyst of true social change if I'm constantly counting pennies, investing, budgeting, scrimping. I don't want or need some obnoxious McMansion or a fancy car. I need fucking enlightenment.
I've been reading a lot about the history and schools of thought within anarchy. It's fascinating. Yes, I have some issues with it. No, it's not perfect. But no system of government/economy (or lack thereof) is perfect. And I think nimrods are finally starting to find that out about Capitalism. But I can't stand McDonalds-this, Revlon-that, buybuybuybuybuybuy this cologne and you'll fuck all the nameless, opinionless, emaciated women in the world! Fuck that shit. I'd rather riot than diet. Why do we care more about Britney Spears than Emma Goldman? Why does half the country lack a basic understanding of civics and political theory (i.e. what socialism actually is, how the three branches of government work, how to fucking read a book)? Do I have to get a reality show in MTV in order to tell people the truth?
And with the coming elections, it seems as though Republicans will be back in power. And then what will we be left with? A nation of God-fearing, pregnant nationalists who feel it's their duty to populate the homeland, pass on traditions, how to get ahead religions, and prosperity via simpleton culture. Like NoFX said, the idiots are taking over.
Sigh.
I just want to marry Cody, buy a farmhouse on some property outside of a city, have a garden and an orchard, teach political theory/feminist studies/white privilege at a respected university, start a community center that focuses on education and social reform for at-risk youths, have 1 or 2 beautiful children that I will raise to be fair-minded activists, publish a few books; essentially having a full but love-filled life. I'm so angry and don't know where to start...hopefully I'll find/grab hold of those opportunities in the coming years.