1. You are such a pretentious, obnoxious bitch. I can't wait until I never have to see you again.
2. I know how much you hate this phrase, but seriously babe, get a grip.
3. I'm pretty sure you're throwing your life away; within 3 years we'll completely lose touch with one another.
4. Starting right now, you no longer have power over my emotions. You are small. You are pitiful. I can't believe I wasted friendship on you.
5. Goodbye. I love you, even though I'm as bad at showing it as you are.
6. As wonderful as things are now, I still have daydreams about my mom calling me and reading your tragic obituary to me. Rot in hell with your cunt of a girlfriend. You two liars deserve each other.
7. I'm really terrified of losing you. I don't want you to be afraid to go in a different direction if the journey with me isn't what you want, but if that actually happens I will most likely never recover. There's no one on this earth as wonderful as you.
8. I'm really sad that we weren't friends before this year, and even sadder that we won't be living in the same area post-graduation. You're one of the most fun and most original people I've ever met. You were my down-to-earth sanctuary in the midst of all this fucking drama and dumbgirlshit. And your corn/macncheese dinners were the best.
9. Why did you decide to be the creepiest person in the world? Do you think greasy hair is fashionable? Because it's not. You kinda make my skin crawl, bud. We used to have a lot of fun together...I miss that.
10. You're a manipulative bitch who will do anything to clutch your pearls and look offended. What's going to happen now that your sidekick is gone? Maybe you should take some classes on professionalism because you are seriously lacking. You are fake and pathetic.
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